"Mikey? I need ya…"

"Raph?"

"Yeah, Mike, ‘s me. Where are ya?" I was coming out of the stairwell onto the ground floor.

"Right here," Mike called from the kitchen.

I walked into the kitchen to find Mike and Don sitting at the kitchen table, each working on a cup of coffee.

"Either of you two seen Leo anywhere?" I asked.

Don piped up. "Upstairs working on his focus, I think. Why, what’s up, Raph?"

"Eh. Just wanted to make sure he didn’t hear this."

My brothers exchanged their familiar "What’s Raph up to now?" look. Mike arched an eyebrow, and Don immediately nodded.

"What are you thinking, Raph?"

"Well, Mike, here’s the sitch. You know the guy I brought us all here to see?"

"Rock?"

"Yup. He’s asked to see me, and he wants you along as a chaperone."

The two of them went back to trading looks. This time it was their "Do we dare go along with this?" look.

"Who said what first, Raph? I mean, did Rock tell you he wanted you over, or did you just tell him you were coming over?"

"He asked me, Mikey. That’s the truth."

"How do we know? I mean, we’re not exactly on whatever wavelength you’re on with the guy…"

"Donny…" I looked away for a moment, trying to conceal my frustration. "Look, I swear to you, on my honor, that he asked me over. That enough for ya?"

My brothers traded a "whatever" look. Mikey spoke next. "He give you any reason why he wanted me to be the chaperone? I mean, Don’s probably a more neutral party as far as Rock’s probably concerned—"

"Didn’t say, Mike. I’m guessing it’s because if he’s going to be facing me, he’d at least like to have someone along who he’s comfy with. And I know you’re probably the one he’d feel most comfortable meeting in a dark alley, if he had no choice, so."

"I’d better tell him I’m a lot more dangerous than he thinks…I mean, sure, I could have surfed with Mickey Dora, but I am still a ninja."

"Don’t tell me that, Mike, tell Rock that guff. And we all know who’s more dangerous between you and me."

Mike looked at Don, the two of them nodded in unison, and Mikey gave his patented "Eee-yah."

"So what do you want me to do, Raph?"

"Grab your coat and your hat, we’re going for a walk, OK, Mike?"

Mike shot one last look at Don, almost as if asking for his approval. "Go, Mike. I’ll keep Leo amused while you two are out. And Raph, I’m guessing you don’t want Leo to know where you two are?"

"Oh, he’s good! See, that’s what being brothers for years and years’ll do for ya. No, Don, Leo doesn’t need to know where we are. You keep a secret?"

Don stroked his chin for a second or six, then shook his head in a "why not" fashion. "OK, Raph, but don’t be gone too long or Leo’s going to really wonder."

"I can handle a little Leo lecture if I get to see Rock in the process. Rock’s worth it."

"Can I come along to see him, too? I mean, if there’s two of us and only one of you, Rock’d feel that much more secure, right?"

I was hoping he wouldn’t ask that. I was prepared, however. "Yeah, but then there’d be three of us and only one of him…he’d be scared stiff, you know? Just me and Mike’d probably be best." I knew Don would see right through that one. But would he take the hint?

More chin-stroking by Don-san. He was sizing this situation up, deciding, deciding…

Don sighed. "You win, Raph. But don’t hurt him, all right?" (Translation: I get the hint, and I don’t like what you’re doing here, but I’m not going to stop you.)

"Thanks, bro. I appreciate that."

"Don’t mention it. But I don’t want to see him take me aside some day and say, ‘Don, is there any way you can, you know, stop Raph from hurting me?’"

"He won’t. Because I’m not going to hurt him. That’s why Mikey’s coming along. Right, Mike?"

"Yup." Mike had gone to the closet in the meantime, and had already put on his overcoat and hat. "I’ll keep him in line, don’t worry, OK, Don?"

"Two of you, one of me, OK, I get it. Mike, don’t leave them alone, OK?"

"Got it…can we go now?"

Don looked at Mike, then me, then back to Mike, then back to me. "Don’t do anything stupid, Raph. And Mike, you make sure nothing bad happens. I even think something’s wrong, I’m dropping the word on both Leo and Master Splinter."

This time, it was me and Mike trading looks—"whatever." "Nothin’s gonna happen, Donnie. We’re just going over to Rock’s place for an introductory chat."

"I’ll take your word on this one, Raph. I’m giving you my trust on this. Don’t misplace it. For Rock’s sake. OK?"

"OK, Don."

"Go on over."

Mike and I walked over to the entryway closet, where I donned my overcoat and fedora. We walked out of the house, closing the door behind us, and I locked the door from the outside.

Once we were out of earshot of the house, Mike piped up. "So, Raph…what are you thinking about doing?"

"Well, there’s this. See, Rock’s got this huge thing about angels. Remember me telling you that?"

"Yeah. I thought that was kind of cool. I mean, hey, I’ve got the letters ‘a-n-g-e-l’ in my name, and you seem to be named after one, from what you told me a while back."

"Right. Trouble is, he even thinks he’s hearing from his angels, he’s gonna shoo us out of his apartment. So I got a plan."

"A plan for what, Raph?"

I didn’t want to spill the beans too quickly, but I had to drop at least a few hints so Mike wouldn’t be completely shocked when it happened. "Put it this way. I want to take him on in a game of chance, and see if he really is being protected by angels. I mean, if he is, I’d better not lay a hand on the guy, right?"

"Eee-yeah, that would make a lot of sense…"

"But—on the other hand—if his angels won’t protect him from me, then it’s game and match, Raphster."

"Ra-aph…what are you thinking?"

We came to a streetlight, and waited for the light to change so we could cross. I waited until we were moving again to tell him.

"I’m thinking I need to set him up for the hardest fall he can take. I want him to lay himself on the line, and see if he’s being protected. If his angels won’t protect him from me and my schemes, then it really is destiny we’re talking about here."

"Hold it just one second." Mike stopped walking. "’Hardest fall’? ‘Lay himself on the line’? ‘Schemes’? ‘Destiny’? I hope to God you’re not thinking what I think you’re thinking, Raph."

"What do you think I’m thinking?"

"That you’re—that you’re—" He looked down, silently said a few words to himself, then looked back at me. "That you’re going to ask him to, you know…"

I was going to play this for all it was worth. "No, Mike, I don’t know. What are you thinking?"

"That you’re going to ask him to…to…" He looked down, with a look reminiscent of Rock when I start talking like this.

"To what, Mikey?"

"You know—the mattress macarena?"

"Well, hey, if it was the macarena, we’d only be using our hands…"

"Raph, stop it." He gave me a look I’d expect from Leo or maybe Don, but which looked out of place on him. "Don’t make him do that. Don already knows what you’re up to, and I don’t want to see either of us in trouble for this."

"Hey, who’s gonna know, Mike? Just your words against mine…"

"I won’t let you do this, Raph," he said, reaching for my arm.

"Then go home," I told him, shaking him away.

"Never. If it takes me fighting you to keep him safe, that’s what I’ll do. I’ve never met him, but I’m not going to let you turn into a rapist."

"I got news for ya, bro…he already thinks I am."

I can’t even begin to describe the look Mike gave at that moment. It was equal parts surprise, hurt, fear, and anger. "What have you been doing in those dreams, Raph?"

"You’ll see, Mike. You’ll see."

"Please, Raph…" There was desperation in his voice, a raw sense of fear. I’ve scared Rock to death, and now one of my brothers is scared of me. God, what am I becoming in this world?

"Mike…I’m sorry. I can’t explain this. It was meant to be this way."

"Why? Why are you going to go to his house, in his world, and making him do something I know he doesn’t want anything to do with?"

I didn’t like us just standing there, having this discussion. I started walking again. Mike followed. "Mike…it’s what he always wanted in the first place. Haven’t I told you that?"

"You didn’t tell me I was going to be dragged along to his apartment, and end up an accessory to rape. That’s not why I’m here, Raph. We’re supposed to be the good guys here. We fight against people like that. We’re supposed to be fighting for people who don’t have the power to fight for themselves. We’re not supposed to be using our skills to hurt people. What would Splinter say if he knew you were doing this?"

"I don’t know. I’d be afraid to find out."

"Well, there’s an easy way you won’t find out. Leave Rock alone. Just go there, we talk with him, maybe let me clean his clock on Knockout Kings 2000, and that’s it. Don’t hurt him. Please, Raph? Can I get that much out of you?"

We came to the corner near Rock’s apartment. The pins and needles started fading in on me. Good. At least he was still there.

"No promises, Mike. But hey, you’re a ninja yourself, so you can always break out your chucks if need be. Deal?"

"Deal. I hope it doesn’t come to that, though, Raph."

"No promises."

We didn’t say a word after that. We walked silently, each of us lost in our own thoughts, towards Rock’s apartment. We came into the building, headed for Rock’s apartment, and made sure no skin was visible. I rang the bell.

Through the door, I heard something between a sputter and a choke. He evidently wasn’t prepared for us. We waited. I heard something slide twice inside the door as Rock opened the peephole, then closed it. I heard him bolt the door, and then the door opened the tiniest fraction.

"Yes?" The fear in his voice was like nothing I had heard before, ever.

Neither Mike nor I spoke. I wanted to make Rock sweat a bit, and Mike knew this wasn’t his time to say anything.

"Show me your faces."

I looked up at Rock, for the first time, and I saw everything I had come to see, and more. It was perhaps the moment of greatest exultation in my life.

"Let us in, Rock," I said as gently as I could. Rock was petrified, I could tell. His hands were shaking, and the color was leaving his face faster than I could say "sai." "Hey, let us in, OK? You look like you could use some comfort."

Rock let us in, fetched some hangers, and then hung up our coats. I don’t know how he was walking around, truth be told. He was shaking so bad I thought he might have been having another seizure. But then, if that were the case, he’d be on the floor, and Mikey would be calling 911.

Mike spoke next—I decided I was going to let him do the talking for now. Didn’t want to scare the Rock that much—he’d have plenty to be scared of in due course, if things worked out.

"You OK, Rock?"

"Yeah…Mike? Mikey? Which is it?"

"Mike’s fine. Mikey if you feel like kidding around. But judging by your body language, you’re not in the mood for kidding around. You’re scared stiff. Am I right?"

Oh, he was right, and in spades. Rock was probably as scared then as he ever was in any of his dreams with me. To call him "terrified" at that moment would be like calling "The School of Athens" a nice little piece that’s kind of typical of the Renaissance. In other words, way, way, way understated.

Mike said a few words to Rock, then guided him to the couch. The two sat on opposite ends of the couch, and I sat in a chair across from the couch, keeping both eyes on him. I wasn’t trying to intimidate him. I just couldn’t believe that I was actually in the same room with him, and that it wouldn’t end when our dreamtime ran out.

Mike tried to reassure him. "You’re going to be OK, Rock. We just came over to see how you were doing. You know, get you used to being in the same room with us and all that." It was a valiant effort. But then, so were the LA District Attorney’s efforts to prosecute O.J. Simpson.

"You mean, get me used to being in the same room with Raph." Rock fired his most defiant look at me, one which never had worked before, and which wasn’t going to work now.

I kept my voice level. "Hey, you’re the one who invited me over here, remember."

Rock hung his head, conceding the point. "Yeah." I knew he wasn’t happy with that fact on the table. The whole "Raph’s doing it all" escape hatch was starting to unravel, and he knew it.

Mike went over to Rock’s end. "Hey. Rock. Rock. It’s all right. I’m here. Raph’s not going to hurt you. Not if I have anything to say about it." He had no idea what he was saying, or how completely wrong he was. Both Mike and Rock were both so scared of me right then that it was starting to scare me. Guess Rock’s right. I really am a monster if both of those two are scared.

Mike was frantically trying to console Rock. "It’s OK. Everything’s going to be all right." It was a losing effort. Rock wasn’t going to be consoled for one thing, and I knew something was about to go very wrong between us.

At least Rock understood the gravity of the situation. "No…it can never be all right…not until I’m done being hurt…"

"No, Rock, don’t even think that. I’ll protect you, OK?" Rock was too scared to say anything. "OK?" Rock nodded, even though he knew. "Good. You need me to hold you for a second, or do you want me on the other end of the couch?"

"No…I want…Raph…to hold me…"

At that exact moment, I knew I had won.

Mike just about freaked, although Rock didn’t notice. "You’re sure?"

Rock nodded. He understood. Thank God, he understood. But I wanted to make sure. "I want to hear you say it with your lips."

"Yeah. I’m sure."

Mike and I traded places, with Mike giving me one really nasty look that Rock didn’t see. Now even he knew. I sat down next to Rock, who recoiled. Apparently, he was having second thoughts. "Hey…Rock…relax, you got Mikey here to protect ya." It was a lie so naked it should have been arrested for indecent exposure.

"But I’m scared of you…"

"I’m not going to hurt you. All right? Don’t nod, say it aloud." I had to at least pretend this was going a different way.

"All right."

"Touch me. Anywhere. You’ve always wondered what my body feels like, and now you get to find out. Nothing’s off limits." If I was right, he would put his hand in one place, and only one place. The one place he had wanted to put it for more than a decade.

Silence. For a long time, a very long time to me, he didn’t move. His eyes tracked all over my body, and I thought for a moment that my hunch was wrong. Maybe he was stronger against me than I thought he was.

And then he reached out, and proved me right all along.

"I was afraid I’d be feeling this before too long."

Bingo. Pull the trigger. "Shall we?"

"Raph…" Mikey said, apparently not knowing the game was already over, and that I’d won.

"Rock’s decision, Mike."

More silence. My eyes were on Rock. He was looking down, and I knew exactly where that hand of his was, thank you very much. It was probably more erotic than anything I’ve ever dreamed with him. And that’s saying something.

"Raph…I’m scared…"

"Tell you what." I lifted his head so that our eyes met. "You think you’ve got angels protecting you, right?"

He knew where that question was headed. The "yes" was so timid, it almost broke my heart.

"Well, let’s see if they’ll protect you. Let’s play a game of chance. You decide the game. If you win, hey, we’ll wait. If I win…hell, if I win, then it’s destiny, right? I mean, your angels can intervene to protect you, right?" It was a serious gamble. If the game didn’t go my way, I would have egg all over my face, and that pressure on the lower part of my plastron was going to have to be gotten rid of some other way.

"Yeah…"

"Well, give them a chance to prove it. I can take it. You win, hey, it wasn’t meant to be right now. But if you lose…well, then, it’s just destiny, right? I mean, if even your guardian angels aren’t going to protect you from me—and they can control chance, right?—then it was simply meant to be, for us to be together as one. How ‘bout it?" My tone of voice must have given my intentions completely away. If there was any doubt between the three of us what was about to happen, there shouldn’t have been.

"No."

"What, you don’t believe in your angels?"

"I do, it’s just—"

"Well, what do you have to lose? They’re on your side, they’ll protect you, there’s no way I’ll win, right?" I had to frame it just right. Play to his faith. It was his weak spot, now, as then. If I could get him to put his trust in his angels, then maybe he’d accept the verdict.

Mike coughed. "Raph…"

I gave him my patented "Psycho Killer" look. Which I’m not—but I can look really nasty when I need to. And I needed to. The pressure was getting intense. Mike knew better than to argue with me—by now, even he knew this was out of control.

I threw down the gauntlet. "Let’s play it. Name the game. You can’t lose. You’ve got the angels on your side, after all."

I thought he was going to back out for a second. There’s no way he’s going to yield to me this easily. He’s going to resist, I can tell. And then, one word…"Oddball."

A game I knew nothing of, thank you very much. But I expected that.

I put the best face on it that I could. "All right. One round of Oddball, win or lose, all or nothing. You win, then we just kick back and chew the fat. You can’t lose with the angels protecting you, but if you do…" I looked him dead in the eye. If he didn’t know before, he knew how final it was.

He nodded. "Let’s do it. And may destiny name the winner."

I nodded. "Destiny will decide. Good luck, all right?" I wanted to sound a little sportsmanlike. I couldn’t show him I was that big of a putz…not that I wanted him to win, but I wanted to at least make him think I did.

"Thanks." We walked over to the dining room table, and took out the game.

"Every Breath You Take"
Performed by The Police

Every breath you take
Every move you make
Every bond you break
Every step you take

I'll be watching you

Every single day
Every word you say
Every game you play
Every night you say

I'll be watching you

O can't you see
You belong to me
How my poor heart aches
With every step you take

Every move you make
Every vow you break
Every smile you fake
Every claim you stake

I'll be watching you

Since you've gone I been lost without a trace
I dream at night I can only see your face
I look around but it's you I can't replace
I feel so cold and I long for your embrace
I keep crying baby, baby, please

O can't you see
You belong to me
How my poor heart aches
With every breath you take

Every move you make
Every vow you break
Every smile you fake
Every claim you stake

Every move you make
Every step you take
I'll be watching you