Chnaces
Chapter 7 of "Blurred Edges"
The fourth part of Absaraka’s narrative

"So how do you play this game, anyway?"

"OK. You get 7 cards, and the idea is to get all 7 in the same color, then get rid of them." I opened the box, and took out the cards and the dice.

"Hold it. Dice? What the heck kind of game is this?"

"Raph, the dice are there to add an element of chance. That’s what you wanted, right? Game of chance? Neh?"

"Eh. So what do the dice do?"

"OK, first thing we do is roll the dice to see who starts. Highest odd number goes first."

Raph picked the dice up and gave them a shake. He rolled a nine.

"Yikes. Only way I can beat you is with an eleven." I rolled the dice, and got a five.

"For your sake, Rock, I hope that’s not an omen."

"Oh, I know it isn’t. It’s a long game, and going first is strictly a bragging-rights proposition."

I dealt the hands out, seven cards apiece, one at a time. I then turned up the top card, which was an Oddball card. Good—one less of those to worry about.

"We look at these?"

"Yeah." I picked up my hand and sorted it out. I had 3 Blues, 2 Purples, a Green, and a Stop.

Raph looked over his hand in confusion. "Which cards mean what in this game?"

"OK. The Green, Purple, Yellow, and Blue cards are the cards you try to collect. Once you have all seven cards in your hand showing the same color, you lay them all out face-up and try to discard them. There are a couple other cards you need to worry about, though.

"First one is the Oddball card. It’s a penalty card. If you draw it, you can’t make any plays until you get rid of it, and you can only get rid of it by rolling an odd number on the dice. What you do if you have it is, wait for your turn, lay it on the table, and then roll the dice. If the dice are odd, you discard the Oddball card and draw a replacement. If the dice are even, you hang on to the Oddball card until you roll an odd number."

"Ah. So that’s why they call it Oddball."

"Right. The other three special cards are Swap, Drop, and Stop."

"They rhyme. Cute. Which ones do what?"

"If you roll an odd number on the dice, you can play a Drop or Swap card. Swap cards mean you and I have to trade hands. I’ll explain Drop cards once we get to ‘em, but suffice it to say that Drop cards can make or break the game."

"I’ll bear that in mind. And Stop cards?"

"If I try to play a Swap or Drop on you, you can play a Stop and the play gets cancelled."

"Got it. Is that everything?"

"I think so. Now hurry up and lose so I don’t have to go through with this."

"Picky, picky. So I have to roll the dice at every turn?"

"Yup. Every turn, you roll the dice. Roll even and you lose your turn. Roll odd, and you play. Roll a 7 and you can either play an action card or make two draws."

"All right. Break a leg." Raph rolled a 5 to start. He drew the top card, then discarded it right away. It was a Yellow card.

"So you’re not collecting Yellows. Thanks for the info."

"Anytime," he snarled.

"Stop it, Raph," snapped Mikey.

"Mikey, leave us alone. This is for me and Rock to play out. I don’t want to hear another word from you, kapeesh?"

"I’ll say what I want, Raph. You’re not my boss."

"I’d hate to have to fight you, Mike."

I jumped in. "And you won’t. Not in my house."

Raph gave me a look so menacing I don’t even want to bother describing. "Hope that means you’re muzzling Mike, and not me. Because you know what the stakes are here. And you also know I can be the vengeful type…" He left that thought in the air, just hanging like a two-days-after-the-burrito fart.

I shot Mike a pleading glance. "I’m sorry…"

Mike looked down at the table. "Don’t be. You’re not the one who’s threatening violence."

"Not a word from either of you. Nothing matters but the game at this point. Mike, you go back over to the couch and leave us alone. Rock, you only talk about the game unless I change the subject."

Mike and I looked at each other, and we knew. We knew that Raph had totally lost control. Without another word, Mike walked over to the couch and sat down hard, his head in his hands. He knew this was out of his control now.

"Play, Rock."

I rolled a 5, drew a Green card, and discarded it—I had 3 blues and only one green, and I wasn’t going to throw out a Stop card to make way for a card I didn’t need.

"Rock’s not collecting Greens, thank you for that bit of info."

Raph rolled an 11, snapped up the green card, and discarded a blue.

"So it’s Greens you’re collecting."

"Stop me."

I rolled. Six, I lost my turn.

"Break for me," said Raph, who proceeded to roll a 4.

"You were saying?" I retorted. The dice turned up 8.

"Looks like your harps and halos crowd doesn’t like ya," Raph riposted, picking up the dice. His luck wasn’t any better, as he rolled another 6.

"Somebody’s got to roll an odd number," I mused, picking up the dice and shaking them. They came down two-five, for a total of 7.

"Lucky you," Raph fired back.

I picked up Raph’s Blue discard, then drew a card from the deck. It was a Drop card. Ouch, this looks good. Four Blues, a Green, a Drop, and a Stop were left as I threw out the two Purples. This is a good hand.

Raph rolled a 9, drew the top card, and discarded another Purple card.

After several even rolls by the two of us, Raph finally got odd with a 7. He drew 2 cards from the stock, then threw out a Blue followed by a Purple. "Rock, I gotta tell ya, it doesn’t look good from where I’m sitting."

"You’re only saying that. It’s too early in the game."

"Maybe not. You’re betting your innocence on it, remember."

"You’re bluffing."

"Maybe not. My advice to you is to start finding those Blue cards I know you’re collecting, ‘cuz I’ve got a very good hand at this point."

"Oh, I’m sure. I just quiver with fear."

"Whatever. Just don’t act surprised when I lay down my hand. Now play."

I picked up the dice and rolled them. Snake eyes.

Raph gave me a long, hard stare as he picked up the dice. He rolled a 9. "Read it and weep, Rock," he said as he played a Drop card.

"No, you weep," I shot back, playing my Stop card.

"You might have just saved everything," Raph mused as the two of us drew to replenish our hands. My draw was a Purple card, completely useless.

The dice just wouldn’t cooperate after that—both of us rolled twice without seeing an odd number. But then Lady Luck smiled, and I rolled a 7.

"You’re gonna need that," Raph sneered.

Wordlessly, I drew two stock cards, one Blue, one Purple. I threw out two Purples, leaving me with 5 Blues, one Green, and a Drop.

Raph then rolled a 7 of his own, drawing two stock cards and then discarding a pair of Yellows.

My turn followed. The dice didn’t like me; I rolled a 12.

"Getting down to the wire," Raph said, as he rolled the dice. An 8.

"Maybe not," I said. I rolled a 9. The stock card was yellow, and I immediately discarded it.

Raph shook his head as he picked up the dice, then rolled. Six.

I rolled a 9, and then slammed down my Drop card. "Stop it if you can, Caliban."

"Oooo, such poetry, such Shakespearean knowledge, such a golden flood of bovine scatology. I don’t have a Stop card. What do I do?"

"Roll one die, and then lay out that many cards of your choice, face-up."

"Let’s hope for a small number," Raph sighed. It was a 2. Raph laid down two cards, both Green. "And I suppose you get to pick them up?"

"Yup." I picked up both cards, then discarded one Green card. I was down to 5 Blues and 2 Greens. One lucky 7 and I’d be there.

"Now I have 5 cards," Raph said.

"Draw 2 from the stock and get back up to 7, then."

Raph drew 2 cards from the stock and shook his head. "Damn. Times like this, Rock, I could hate your guts real easy-like."

"Well, I hate you enough as it is, so now you know the feeling. Now play."

Raph rolled a 4; I rolled a 10; Raph rolled an 8.

I rolled a 9, drawing and discarding a Yellow.

Raph rolled another 9, drew a card, and threw another Yellow.

I rolled a 5, and drew—damn. I threw out one of my two Greens in utter disgust. "Roll even, you monster."

He rolled a 9, picked up the Green, and discarded one of the Blue cards I needed to win.

I rolled a 7 on my next turn, discarded the Oddball, and drew another Green. I was back to where I started.

Raph then rolled another 7, and drew two cards from the stock. He furiously discarded two Blues.

"Hey, Rock, time for your angels to intervene. They’ll give you a 7 sure as I’ve got a shell on my back."

They didn’t. I got an 8.

"A tragedy…" Raph sighed in mock compassion, showed his Oddball card, then rolled. Six.

"Maybe not," I retorted, mentally praying for a miracle as I rolled the dice. If I can get a 7, I can pick up two Blues and be that much closer to the game. But the angels were silent; I rolled boxcars, losing my turn.

"Damn, Rock, it must be destiny…"

"Shut up."

"Hey, truth hurts sometimes." He rolled a 9, then discarded the Oddball right over the two Blues I needed. "I think the fat lady’s warming up, Rock," Raph grinned, as he drew to bring his hand back to 7 cards.

"It’s not over yet." I rolled a 3, drew a Purple, and threw it out.

Raph rolled a 6; I rolled a hardway 4; Raph rolled another 6.

The dice went my way then: I got another 7. But the cards were Yellow and Swap, neither of which I could hold on to. Hanging on to them would mean throwing a green card out for Raph to pick up, and I didn’t know how many green cards he had. I had 5 Blues as it was, and I wasn’t going to swap those out on the chance that Raph had a worse hand. I discarded the Swap, then the Yellow.

Raph rolled a 5. He drew a stock card and threw down a Yellow.

I then proceeded to roll a square pair.

Raph rolled a nickel, then drew a Purple card and discarded it without putting it into his hand.

Both of us then rolled eights. The dice came back to me, and I rolled a 9. I drew the top card—swear word. Oddball. I had to discard another Green.

Raph gave me a very serious look. "Right now, we could be looking at some serious destiny here. You’d better pray I don’t roll a 7."

"You won’t. The angels won’t let you."

Raph picked up the dice, shook them, looked deeply into my eyes, then rolled. A one and a six, for a total of seven. He picked up both of the upcards, discarded a Purple on top of a much-needed Blue, then lay his hand down, showing seven Greens.

"Your angels have left you."

"You still have to discard those."

"Oh, I will. It’s destiny, don’t you understand?"

"I’m protected by the forces of the light, thank you very much."

"We’ll see. It’s your turn, I think."

I rolled a 9, and got rid of that pesky Oddball. The draw didn’t help a whit: it was a Swap card, and I couldn’t use it against Raph now that he was going out.

"Destiny," Raph said, rolling the dice. Five. He was down to six cards.

"I’ll get back in this," I said, but I was having second thoughts. God, what happens if I really do lose? I rolled.

"You won’t get back in it rolling a square pair, that’s for sure," Raph grinned, referring to my double 4. He rolled a 3, bringing him down to 5 cards.

I rolled Texas sunflowers and lost my turn. Raph didn’t fare much better with a 4. But another 8 kept me from drawing yet again. And I was only 5 odd numbers away from losing the game.

Raph picked the dice up with the air of a billionaire at a no-limit game of Craps on the Las Vegas Strip. He could smell it. Both the impending victory…and the fear that was now rising in me like flood tide in the Bay of Fundy. He rolled a 3. Four cards to go.

"I need a 7, please, angels, help me," I all but groaned, as Raph looked on with a sinister smile. Three and four. A seven. Maybe there was hope after all.

The cards weren’t as kind as the dice. I drew a Drop and a Swap, both completely useless. I discarded two Swaps with a heavy hand. I knew it was over. He only had four cards to get rid of, while I still had to collect two Blues before I could even start discarding.

"Given up on your angels?" Raph asked. His tone of voice was utterly casual. No menace, no flippancy, nothing. He didn’t ask as if he were gloating, or sorry, or sarcastic, or sympathetic. He just…asked.

"No…I haven’t…" I was almost in tears.

"Call them. Maybe you know one or two to call on by name. Is there a patron angel of card games?" He wasn’t being sarcastic at all. He almost sounded as if he were legitimately interested. I knew that at that moment, he was mentally undressing me, and planning exactly where to touch me…with every part of his body…

"I know Barakiel and Rubiel are supposed to be friendly to gamblers…" I somehow managed to say. My voice was shaking, bad.

"Well, call on them. Tell them you need their help. Maybe they’ll keep me on the even numbers…"

I addressed them aloud. "Barakiel…Rubiel…please…I need your help…If I lose this game, I’m going to be…be…hurt…and I might not survive the aftermath…if there’s any way you can help me, please…PLEASE…"

After a moment of tortured silence, Raph looked me in the eye and said, "It’s my turn now." He rolled an 8. "Well…looks like they might have heard you after all."

I wasn’t consoled. I rolled a 3, and drew a Purple, which I discarded.

Raph’s next roll was a 4.

I rolled a 9, and drew a Stop card. I held onto it for no reason, and threw out a Green. "No point saving this anymore."

"Hm," Raph grunted as he picked up the dice. Five. He was now down to three cards. "Your angels haven’t protected you. Destiny is deciding the winner, right now. I’d advise you to start mentally preparing yourself."

I picked up the dice, silently addressing every last angel I could think of. And rolled an 8.

Raph shook his head in amusement. "Concede the game, Rock. It’s over. Maybe I’ll go a little easy on you if you just admit it’s destiny you’re dealing with here."

"It isn’t. They’ll let you get ahead now, but then I’ll come back and blow right past you. Then you’ll have no choice but to admit that I’m protected by the light."

"Whatever," Raph sighed. HE ROLLED A 7. He was now down to one final card.

"Rock…it’s over. Surrender to me. Your angels aren’t protecting you. Or who knows, maybe you’re not going high enough on the cosmic ladder, ever think of that?"

I honestly hadn’t thought of that. "Michael, Gabriel, Uriel, Archangel Raphael, please…protect me…save me from this fate…save me from this…this…monster. Save me from this…destiny…" Desperately, I rolled. A three. I drew from the stock…

I threw out the Drop card I had left in my hand, and I knew that it was over.

Raph rolled an 8, but I knew. I rolled a 4. Raph then rolled a 5, placing his last card on the discard pile.

"It’s over, Rock. Destiny has chosen me. And now, whether you want to face it or not, you have no choice. Let’s do this. Now. And forever. Let’s unite, in mind, soul, and body. Let’s discover just why we’re together, here."

I was anchored to my seat. I knew it was no use to protest. I had already known that this was going to happen; I just wasn’t ready for it to be this quickly. But then, I probably wouldn’t have been ready for it if I had waited another year.

"Come with me, Rock. Let’s experience, now, for the first time, what we’ve only dreamed about. It’s destiny." He stood up, walked around the table, and offered me his hand. I took it, and he helped me to my feet. I looked over at Mikey, who was still on the couch, and who was as shocked as I was. Mike’s eyes met mine; then he looked away. I knew he was feeling guilty about this already.

Raph gently turned my head so that our eyes met. "It’s time."

My heart in my throat, I followed him as he led me into my room.

Is this the real life?
Is this just fantasy?
Caught in a landslide,
No escape from reality…
Open your eyes,
Look up to the skies and see
I’m just a poor boy,
I need no sympathies
Because I’m easy come, easy go,
Little high, little low,
Any way the wind blows,
Doesn’t really matter to me
Mamma just killed a man
Put a gun against his head,
Pulled my trigger, now he’s dead
Mamma, life had just begun
But now I’ve gone and thrown it all away
Mamma, oooh, didn’t mean to make you cry
If I’m not back again this time tomorrow
Carry on, carry on, as if nothing really matters
Too late, my time has come
Sends shivers down my spine
Body’s aching all the time
Good-bye, everybody, I’ve got to go
Gotta leave you all behind and face the truth
Mamma, oooh, I don’t want to die
I sometimes wish I’d never been born at all
I see a little silhouette-o of a man
Scaramouche, Scaramouche, will you do the Fandango
Thunderbolt and lightning, very very frightening, me
Galileo (Galileo) Galileo (Galileo) Galileo Figaro (Magnifico)
I’m just a poor boy, nobody loves me
He’s just a poor boy, from a poor family
Spare him his life from this monstrosity
Easy come, easy go, will you let me go?
Bismillah! No, we will not let you go
(Let him go!) Bismillah! We will not let you go
(Let him go!) Bismillah! We will not let you go
Will not let you go, Will not let you go,
Never never, no no no no no
Oh Mamma mia, Mamma mia, Mamma mia, let me go
Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me, for me, for me
So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye?
So you think you can love me and leave me to die?
Oh baby, can’t do this to me baby,
Just gotta get out, just gotta get right out of here
Nothing really matters, anyone can see
Nothing really matters
Nothing really matters to me
Any way the wind blows…