Sometimes I wonder what in my past life dictated that Fate would put me in the place I am in today.
Some would think that Life has been extraordinarily kind to a simple pet store rat like myself.
After all, I have lived longer- much longer- than the normal life span of such as my original self.
I have become, through "mutation", an intelligent, sentient being; human-like, but never human.
I have become, in many ways, what my Master Yoshi was.
I have also been the "father" of four turtles for these many years; four turtles who also were "mutated" into intelligent, sentient beings.
(Mikey: Hey, Raph! Wanna see me blow milk out my nose?)
Well, sentient at least.
Let me tell you a story.
"Father's Day"
Chapter 1:Donatello
I am in my room, staring at the collection of bad neckties and handmade cards I have received over the years.
I know that they have planned something special.
Again.
They try to hide so much from me, even after all these years.
But they are as transparent as moonlight.
"Surprise! Happy Father's Day!"
I try not to sigh noticeably.
"We've got a special day planned just for you, Sensei," Leonardo says, as he does each year, escorting me to the table where it is apparent yet again that Michaelangelo has prepared breakfast.
I wish he could learn to make something other than scrambled eggs.
"We got you a present, Sensei," Raphael says enthusiastically, handing me a badly wrapped gift- I suspect Leonardo has been allowed once again near the wrapping paper and tape.
"Ah- a DVD of WWE's Greatest Smackdowns," I say with as much gratitude as possible. They gave me the video last year. I thank them all sincerely.
"That's not the end of the gifts, Sensei," Donatello announces. "We're each going to spend part of the day with you!"
"We decided that we should spend approximately two hours each just with you- not counting travel time-, doing any fun thing you want to do!" Michaelangelo grins.
"You are too kind," I try to get out of this. "I think that I would rather just enjoy the day calmly. You are young, and should enjoy your time in ways that are pleasing to you."
"But it does please us to spend time with you," Leonardo says. "We hardly ever get to do anything with you alone. We seem lately to either be training or fighting."
"Gee, you sound as if you don't want to spend time with each of us."
Michaelangelo is astute- it comes and goes, usually at the most surprising times.
"My sons, I can think of nothing I would rather do than spend time with you all. But why one at a time? We are family. Why not spend this time together?"
"Told you he'd try to bail on this," I hear Raphael wisely whisper to Donetello.
I sigh, defeated.
"I just do not want to- what is it the young say- cramp your styles," I make one last attempt. They laugh.
"The young said that in the last century, but we understand," Donetello says. "I drew first pick, so in about a half-hour you and I are off for some father/son fun!"
We finish breakfast, and I am allowed to meditate- not desperately, I stress to you all- and then I meet Donetello in the garage.
I gather that he thinks the kind of fun I would like is to ride in the newly refurbished Battle Shell at breakneck speed, observing all the new improvements and inventions he has been busy with.
Alas, he does have a destination in mind.
"April set it up for us! You're gonna love it!" he assures me. "Though we gotta wear disguises."
"Disguises, my son?"
"Yeah- we're going to a computer show! It's gonna be great!"
I close my eyes, and try not to grip the seat as we take a turn rather quickly.
"We are going into public, my son?"
"Yeah, you'll love it!"
If we are not discovered, I think.
We are met by Miss O'Neal in a side alley, where I am required to disguise myself.
I do not think this will work, but for some reason I am proven wrong.
Fate, perhaps?
I have a hard time understanding Donetello's enthusiasm for these things.
I will not repeat what he said during this time- I can barely recall the exact words.
This is in part due to my fear of discovery in such a crowded place, coupled with the fact that I have absolutely no idea what it is he is talking about.
Something about things that bite, protection from worms, and male sheep with vast memories.
All too soon- from my son's point of view- we must leave and return home.
I thank him for the enjoyable morning. He beams with pride.
Perhaps it was worth it, after all.