That evening, I stood alone in Mike's bedroom, staring out the window at the street below. Dozens of people were rushing here and there with shopping bags and strollers, gripping the hands of their children or significant others. I felt depression wash over me as I watched them hurry about with their busy lives, totally oblivious to the rest of the world.

I longed for that kind of life, full of normalcy, shared with loved ones--a family. Long ago, I had come to accept the fact that I would probably never have that sort of existence. A big family and a house in the suburbs isn't for everyone. Still, watching them go about their happy lives, I was reminded of my pain--the anguish of loss, the anger of violation. I found myself blaming those people, even though I knew it couldn't possibly be their fault. It didn't seem fair that I had to suffer while they carried on with life as usual, without even so much as an interruption.

I was feeling sorry for myself, and I knew it. It was an emotion I wasn't fond of. It made me feel helpless and out of control. All I could think about was everything I had lost so quickly. In a matter of four days, my entire life had been turned upside down. My existence, as I'd known it, had been stolen away from me, and all that was left were the shattered pieces and fragments of lost memories. I felt like things would never be the same again. I would never regain all I had lost, never be truly happy. My only comfort came with the thought of my enemies--for I decided that no matter what, I would get revenge for what they'd done. I would not allow them to hold me in fear.

A knock at the door disrupted my thoughts. Reluctantly, I pulled away from the window and went to answer it. I was surprised to find that it wasn't Michaelangelo who greeted me.

"Uhhh...Donatello, right?"

He smiled that awkward smile. "Wow, you got it on the first guess. I'm impressed."

Even though smiling was the last thing I wanted to do at the moment, I returned the gesture and ushered him inside. I sat down on the edge of the bed, feeling defeated and tired. I guess my expression must have reflected my foul mood, because Donatello kept his distance. He stared at me reluctantly, his hands hidden behind his back.

"I could come back later if this isn't a good time..."

"No." I smiled weakly. "This is as good a time as any." I patted the bed next to me, and he cautiously strolled over and sat down, keeping a space between us.

"I brought you something."

"Yeah? What's that?"

"Uhh...it's nothing spectacular really, I just thought you might like to have it."

I watched him in curiosity as he pulled something flat and rectangular from behind his back and handed it to me. Tears filled my eyes as I stared down at the framed photograph. It was the picture of me and my father that I kept on my mantel. We'd had the picture taken at a carnival on my thirty-second birthday. Dad had insisted we ride the carousel. We hadn't done that together since I was a kid. It was the last picture we'd taken together before he died. It was one of my most prized possessions.

"Donatello..." I said quietly. "Thank you. But how did you find it?"

"I saw it laying in some of the rubble before we left. The glass was broken, but the frame was still in good condition. It was an easy fix. I figured since everything else had been destroyed, you might like to hold onto it."

I nodded and hugged him tightly. It was the nicest thing anyone had done for me in a long time. Donatello slowly reached an arm around me and patted my back. After a few long moments, I was able to collect myself enough to pull away. His face was unreadable, save for the hint of sympathy in his eyes. I was eternally grateful to him for this small act of kindness, even though he insisted it wasn't any trouble.

"The man in the picture...it seemed like he was probably pretty important to you. Is he your boyfriend?"

I almost laughed out loud. "No...that's my dad. He died a couple of years ago."

"Oh. I'm sorry to hear that. You two must have been pretty close."

"Yeah...we were..."

Donatello's expression turned sorrowful. "I know how it is. If anything ever happened to Splinter...well, this was the least I could do after you saved his life."

I wasn't sure what to say. They kept thanking me for saving him, but in reality, I had only done what I thought was humane. Splinter himself had done most of the work anyway, and he'd already returned the debt. If he hadn't found me in that elevator...I shudder at the thought. In any case, freeing him had been the right thing to do, and as time wore on, I became more and more convinced of that.

Later that night, Raphael showed up, and he and Mike walked me down the hall to finally meet April. My escorts seemed energetic about this visit--Raphael especially, which I found a little odd. I hadn't seen him crack a smile since we'd met, but now he was laughing and talking anxiously, as if he was Michaelangelo in disguise.

April was different from what I'd expected. She looked to be about my age, close to my height, and slender, with longish, dark, wavy hair. Her eyes were a pleasant shade of green, and when she smiled, the faint lines in her face told me a story about her life. It seemed she had been through quite a lot. It gave me a renewed strength to see the determination in her eyes. If she could overcome her obstacles, whatever they might have been, then I could conquer mine as well.

Her husband's name was Casey. I hadn't heard much about him, but it appeared that he and Raphael were pretty close. The minute we walked in the door, they began a silly charade of punching each other in the arm and trying to give one another noogies. Casey was on the tall side, close to six feet. There was a childish cuteness about him that balanced out quite nicely with his rugged handsomeness. His dark hair was long, just past his shoulders, and his face held a couple days worth of razor stubble. His broad chest and toned arms rendered him a big guy, but not overly so. There was a mischievous look about him that I couldn't quite place. In any case, I couldn't help but feel a twinge of jealousy that April had landed such a hunk.

Their eight year old daughter, and Michaelangelo's main interest at the moment, was Shadow. She was a beautiful little girl. I soon learned that she had been adopted, which made sense, with her blond hair and fair skin. Still, the way the three of them interacted, it was obvious that they loved her just as much as if she'd been their own. Mike seemed to have a particular bond with her, almost like the way a big brother is with his little sister, but deeper.

As the turtles occupied themselves with Shadow and Casey, April motioned me toward the kitchen. I followed her gratefully, already bored of video games and car talk. Once we were out of ear range, I saw her relax a bit. She offered me a weak smile before turning away to reach into a cupboard.

"It's so difficult to find time to myself anymore." She said softly.

I watched her take out a couple of mugs and set them on the counter.

"I bet it's hard, trying to balance a kid and a career..."

"Heh..." She grinned. "Try five kids, an overactive husband, and a job that has me working nights most of the week."

"Wow...my life isn't even that stressful." I smiled. "So, the turtles keep you pretty busy, huh?"

She grinned back at me. "Let's just say that with them around, life is never dull. You want some tea?"

"Sure, I'd love some."

She poured hot water into the cups and carried them to the table, where we both sat down. I glanced around her kitchen--at the nicely finished cabinets, the immaculate countertops, and the freshly tiled floor. Her apartment was beautiful, and I told her so.

"Thanks. I put a lot of work into this place. It wasn't in the best of shape when I bought it."

I was suddenly reminded of my own apartment--the only home I'd known for the past four years. I lowered my eyes to stare at my reflection in the tea. A serious, somewhat distraught face stared back at me. Everything I'd owned was in that apartment, and now it was gone.

"Holly? You okay?"

"Huh?" I glanced up at her, realizing that I'd been daydreaming. She was watching me, concern in her eyes. "Oh...yeah, I'm fine."

"Listen, I heard what happened to your apartment, and I just wanted to say that I'm sorry. I know what it's like. My first apartment went up in flames almost ten years ago. I lost everything. What made it worse was the loss of my dad's antique shop. Suddenly, everything I'd tried so hard to hold onto was gone. God, I thought I'd never get my life back together."

She had lost her home too? I began to feel an instant connection with her. She'd been through a similar ordeal. She understood what I was going through. "I didn't know. I'm really sorry."

"Aw, don't be. It took a long time to get things back in order, but luckily, I had Splinter and the guys to look out for me. I believe that nothing happens without a reason. Looking back now, I think the change was for the better."

I couldn't help but smile. She had the best attitude of anyone I knew.

"Even the guys can relate. I've lost count of the number of times they've had to move and leave the things they loved behind. It can get treacherous for them, always having to hide from the outside world."

I suddenly felt very selfish. All I had been thinking about all day was myself, and how all of this had affected my life. I'd never stopped to think about all of the pain and loss my new friends must have endured in their lifetime. My problems suddenly seemed so small and insignificant.

"Anyway...about your apartment...Casey and I were talking, and we decided it might be a good idea if you stayed with us for a while."

I stared at her in shock. "I...no, I couldn't do that."

"Holly, we want you to. It'll be less of a burden on Mike, with his fluctuating income, and Casey could really use some time to himself at night. You could watch Shadow so he can get some rest. Besides, it would be a welcome change to have some womanly companionship in this house for a while."

"Well..." I considered my options carefully. I really didn't want to intrude on these people's lives. I'd only just met them, and I wasn't one to take advantage. Still, I had to admit, the opportunity for female bonding was appealing. I hadn't had much chance for a social life in the last couple of years. "I need to get my life in order. I don't want to be a burden on anyone. I'm going out Monday to find a job, and as soon as I can, I'll be back in my own place. It really shouldn't take me long, so--"

"Splinter thinks you should wait a while."

"What? He does? Why...?"

She shrugged. "He thinks you'd be safer around all of us...with friends. Just for a little while, until all of this craziness dies down. He's very protective, you know."

"Yeah, I'm starting to get that feeling."

"I think he's right. "I've been in similar situations. Things can get really dangerous. It's good to have these guys on your side, and to be around people you trust. Besides, it's really no trouble at all."

"I have a dog."

"Great. We love dogs. Shadow will be ecstatic."

"I don't know..."

"I could take you shopping..." She said enticingly. "I know all of the best places. Besides, if you feel that strongly about it, you can help with the housework if you want. Believe me, I have no objections."

"Well...okay." I finally gave in, seeing how persistent she could be. "But just for a little while. As soon as I can get my life back into some kind of order, I'll be out of your hair."

"It's a deal." She smiled.

After I fed Buster and got him settled in our new temporary home, I headed for the bathroom to take a nice, relaxing shower. It seemed like weeks had gone by since I'd last washed. In reality, it had been little more than a day, but I felt dirty. The thought of Curtis's grubby fingerprints still lingering on my body made me want to wretch.

I turned on the water and undressed, watching the steam rise from beyond the glass door to coat the mirror. I wiped at the fogged glass with my hand, and stared at my reflection. I looked the same as always, if not a little rougher around the edges. Sorrow outlined the features of my face, but my eyes burned with determination and confidence. I would get through this, no matter what.

I ran a hand lightly over the bandage at my neck. Stitches weren't supposed to get wet, so I would have to be extra cautious. I peeled the bandage carefully, and threw it in the trash. It looked like a pretty nasty cut, but it wasn't fatal, and Mike had actually done a pretty damn good job of stitching it up. I made it a point to remember to thank him later.

As I stood under the warm water, I felt some of my troubles begin to melt away. I was safe, I was among friends, who for no significant reason, seemed to care a great deal about me. I had a place to stay, Buster was with me, and I was a survivor. I had done something that many people wouldn't have dared to, and I believed that it made a difference somehow. For the first time in a long while, I felt truly happy again.

I leaned my head back against the shower wall and closed my eyes, letting the trickles of warm water fall on my face. I let out a sigh as I felt myself relax at last. It felt so good to know that I was finally out of harm's way again, if even only for a little while.

Suddenly, a sound startled me. I rose my head and listened carefully for a moment. It sounded as if someone was trying to get inside. On instinct, I slid the shower door open, just enough to grab the nearest, heaviest object I could find. Unfortunately, there was nothing of the sort, so I had to settle for the toilet brush. I slunk back behind the shower door, gripping it tightly as the person entered, ready to defend myself against the unseen attacker.

The door opened, and in he walked. Without hesitation, I lunged out, striking my assailant in the face.

"Ack! Ecckk...hey! What gives!?"

"Raph!?" I stared at him totally stunned.

"Geeze, Holly, don't you know where the hell that thing's been?" He was too busy wiping at his face to look at me. I realized I was still standing next to him, completely naked, and I quickly jumped back into the shower, sliding the door closed, so only my head peaked out.

"Shit, Raph! You scared me half to death! What are you doing in here anyway? Don't you know how to knock?"

His face heated up as he turned toward me. "Well, excuse me! If you were that worried about it, you shoulda locked the damn door!"

I was getting really angry now. "The point is, I shouldn't have to! Don't tell me Splinter didn't teach you any manners!"

"Oh, he taught me plenty! Like you shouldn't go around hitting people with used toilet brushes, and--" He stopped mid-sentence as he finally realized that he'd managed to intrude on me while I was buck naked.

"As if you couldn't hear the water running from the other side of the door!"

"Yeah, well, maybe if you hadn't hogged up the bathroom for so long, I wouldn't have walked in on you. There are people out there who have to take a leak, ya know!" That angry fire in his eyes still lingered, but something in his face began to soften. I noticed his eyes begin to wander and I realized that he was trying to sneak a peak at the rest of me, which was hidden behind the frosted glass.

"Hey!" I yelled. "My face is up here!"

"So I noticed..." He grinned. It was the first time he'd ever smiled at me, and I can't say it was a welcomed change.

I turned off the water and slid my hand out of the shower to grab my towel. I didn't bother drying myself off. I wrapped it around me and stepped out, still wielding the toilet brush. "Get the hell out of here, Raph!" I screamed. "Get out! Out!" I smacked him several more times with the brush as he hurried for the door.

"Okay, okay, I get the message." He turned to me, running his eyes over the folds of the towel one last time, and shot me a mischievous smirk. Oooh, that infuriated me. I smacked him hard on the head, and as soon as he ran for the hallway, I slammed the door and locked it tight.

The next morning, I rose early and made my way to the kitchen for a cup of coffee. April was already up. She took one look at me in the same outfit I'd been wearing the day before, and insisted that I borrow some of her clothes. It was quite an opportune coincidence that we were close to the same size. I reluctantly put on a pair of her jeans, and a dark green sweater (which happened to look fantastic on me, if not just a tiny bit big), but I insisted that we go shopping so I could get my own things. I didn't want her to have to alter her life for me, and I longed to have something of my own again--anything, just so I could say it was mine, and mine alone.

As we dressed and got ready to go, I thought about my car. I'd left it that night in the locked parking structure. I wondered if it was still there, or if they'd destroyed that too. I knew I couldn't go there, not now. It was too soon. If anyone saw me, I would be putting myself at great risk. I was starting to believe that my enemies had more power than I'd previously imagined. Splinter was right. It was too early to expose myself. I was even taking a risk by going to the mall. But I couldn't stay locked up forever, or I would go insane. Besides, new clothes were a definite necessity.

We spent a good part of the afternoon 'bonding'. We talked about all sorts of things--from men, to our careers, to food, and even our mutant friends. I found we had a lot in common, including our taste in clothes. April has a good eye for color, and her opinions helped me tremendously.

After what seemed like hours of trying things on, I finally decided on a couple pairs of jeans, a pair of shorts, two sweaters, a velvet button down shirt, and a tank top. I would have liked to get more, but I didn't want to max out my credit card. I only had a little bit of money in the bank, so I would have to rely heavily on plastic until I could find a job.

I set the clothes on the counter and handed my credit card to the saleswoman.

"Hey, do you like Chinese?" April asked.

"Yeah, why?"

"There's this great place a few blocks from the apartment, and I thought maybe after this, we could--"

"Excuse me...miss?" A voice called over my shoulder. I turned my attention toward the saleswoman, who was holding up my card. "This credit card has been declined."

"What? That can't be. I paid it off two months ago. There should be an available balance of a thousand dollars. Can you run it again?"

She tried again, but came up with the same results.

I felt embarrassment wash over me. I couldn't understand it. I knew that card was paid off. There was no reason for it to be denied.

"I'm sorry, but the credit card company is telling me the account is closed."

I stared at her in disbelief, adrenaline rushing through me now. "That's impossible."

"Hey, don't worry about it, I can get it for you." April offered. "You can just pay me back later."

"No." I shook my head and began to dig in my purse. I knew I had enough cash with me to cover the purchase, but after that, my wallet would be almost empty. "Here. I'll just pay in cash." I handed the money to her and reached for my card, but she pulled it away.

"I'm sorry, the credit company is telling me to cut up your card."

"I don't believe this..." Now I was really starting to get angry.

"Look," April offered. "This is probably just a screw-up on the creditor's end. Can't you just give her card back and let her call the company later to reconcile this?"

The lady shook her head. "I'm sorry. We have to do what they say in matters like this."

"Fine." I was aggravated. I just wanted to get out of there--away from all of the questioning eyes. "It's fine. Just give me my receipt and we'll be on our way."

"I don't believe this..." I stared out the window as April drove, feeling my face grow flushed. "I just don't understand what happened. I know I had money on that card."

April sensed my embarrassment and did her best to console me. "Hey, don't worry about it. Things like this happen all the time. I'm sure it's all a big mistake."

"I don't know what to do. I was relying on that card. I think I have about fifty dollars to my name right now. And the money in my account won't be enough to live on for long."

When we got to the bank, I was met with even more unexplainable obstacles.

"Uhhh...I'm sorry, miss." The teller typed busily at his keyboard, frowning at the screen. "This account has been closed."

"No...no way." I breathed.

"We could open another account for you, but you would have to give us at least a fifty dollar deposit, because your current balance is zero."

"No...I had at least four hundred dollars in there. My account was just fine two days ago when I made the deposit."

"I'm sorry, I don't know what could have happened then. Maybe someone else on the account closed it for you?"

"No. I was the only one on the account, and I sure as hell didn't close it! I made my deposit on Thursday, and took back two hundred dollars, and that was it."

"I'm really sorry, I don't know what to tell you...Would you like to open another account?"

"No. What I'd like for you to do is give me my money!"

April took me gently by the arm to try to calm me down. "We'll come back later." She told him politely. "Thanks for your help." Then she guided me toward the door.

I felt totally helpless again as we walked across the parking lot toward her van. Had the whole world gone crazy? Where had all of my money gone, and how could two places make the same mistake at once? The idea seemed preposterous. Was someone messing with my mind? Had someone stolen my money? Then it hit me.

"Oh god..." I gasped.

April stared at me in concern. "What? What is it?"

"Jim...he had access to my personal files. Shit! They're trying to track me down. They're the ones doing this to me. God, April, they're trying to shut down my entire life."

All at once, anger, emptiness, and terror filled me completely. Only then did I truly come to realize the severity of what I'd gotten myself into.