Special warning from the author:
This entire story is tagged as "Mature audiences only." Which means you shouldn’t have gotten even this far if you’re not old enough/wise enough to handle more mature subject matter. Yet at this point in the story, I, as the author, feel compelled to issue a special content warning/disclaimer for this chapter. I haven’t started writing it yet (I’m writing this part first), but if some of the "shots on the storyboard" play out, this is going to be a very graphic chapter. You have been warned.

Raph walked into my room as if it were his own, then turned to face me as I walked in. "Close the door. You ready for this?"

"NO!! Can’t we just…just…do this some other time…?" I was terrified the way "It’s a Wonderful Life" was a nice little Christmas movie. Or the way Mount Washington got a few breezes now and then.

"Look, Rock, if you can’t do this, then why the hell am I here?"

"It wasn’t my idea for you to come over here. You’re the one who was studying the whole blurred edge bit…"

"And you weren’t looking into the same things on your side? Let’s look in your bookcase." He turned around and started running his hands over the books. "Let’s see, you’ve got books on out-of-body experiences…self-hypnosis…hmm, "Summoning Spirits" by Konstantinos? The hell would your family think?" He turned around to face me, as I hung my head. "You wanted this too, Rock. Admit it."

The tears were flowing now. "Raph, please…I didn’t think it would come to this…"

"Oh, don’t tell me you’re that naïve…How many times have you fantasized about what I feel like as a lover? I know that number’s got to have a comma by now. The fact is, you were thinking about it a long time before our dreams turned erotic. So when we finally did get the hook-up going, it wasn’t as if it were a surprise. The only thing that surprised you was how good it actually felt."

Before I could make a move, he had me in his arms. I turned my head away; I couldn’t even look at him.

"Look at me, Rock." I knew a command when I heard one. I slowly turned back to face this monster again. "Let’s reason this out. We’re both rebels. Me in action, you in heart. So let’s just do this now. Let’s rebel. Against everything we both know we shouldn’t do."

"You know we shouldn’t be doing this, then. So why? Why should we just screw each other when we both know we shouldn’t?"

Without warning, his lips were on mine, his right hand holding my head in place. I was terrified beyond words—but only for an instant. As quickly as the terror was there, it disappeared, and I felt instinct taking over. My hands moved up to his shoulders, seemingly without any input from my brain. I began to participate in the osculation, and for a brief few seconds started to enjoy it. But then I suddenly remembered who exactly it was that I was swapping spit with. I struggled for a second, then tried to pull away. He let go of my head, but not the rest of me.

"What’s wrong?" Both of us were breathing more heavily than we had been, although we weren’t exactly panting like steam engines.

"Raph, we can’t do this…"

He pulled me back in again, and this time held nothing back. His kisses were wild, untamed—as if whatever reptilian nature he still had, were being put on display for my horror/enjoyment. His left arm, with which he held my back, was moving up and down along my (still clothed, thank God) back, his right hand still holding my head to his as he savagely attacked my mouth with his own. He refused to let up, and I could feel myself slowly losing my will to fight. I had to break free…

Somehow, I got my hands back on his shoulders and gave him the hardest push I could. He let me go, completely.

"Rock…destiny…I can see you need me…" We both were doing some rather heavy breathing now.

"We aren’t…supposed…to do this…please, Raph…this is too much…I like this…so far…but I don’t…want to do…too much too fast…"

I didn’t even see what happened next. Somehow I was on my back in my bed, with Raph straddling me, his knees inches from my shoulders and his lips once again glued to mine. My hands were free to move wherever the wanted, and, the passion being what it was, almost instantly were on his thighs.

And for just a moment, I understood…

Suddenly, the door to my room rocketed open, and Mikey was somehow trying to pull Raph off of me. "Leave him alone, Raph! He doesn’t want this!" Mike tried his best—credit where it’s due—to separate us. But Raph only held me closer. His arms slid under my back and clasped me to his plastron. At the same time, he moved his legs back down toward the end of the bed and intertwined his feet with mine. Try as he might, Mike couldn’t separate us physically. And the more Raph held on, the more excited I became. I wanted to get back to that moment I had just felt—being able to understand, if only for a second—and I knew that if the choice were mine to make, that I would surrender to him. So now, all that stood between me, Raph, and a destiny neither of us wanted to face in the first place…were the words of the "least dangerous" of Raph’s brothers.

"Raph, you’re not like this! You’re better than this! Don’t you see? You’re hurting everyone around you, Raph, it’s him, it’s me, it’s…damn it, Raph, what would Leo think? Or Splinter? Raph, snap out of it, please, don’t just keep hurting all of us…" Mike was in tears right then. He was more scared than I was. And all he was, was a bystander in all this.

Still holding me close to him, Raph turned to look at his brother. Being caught up in his embrace like this was exhilarating, almost too good to be true. My hands were about halfway down his plastron at this point, and they moved back down again without my brain’s command. I want to understand…

The look Raph gave his brother was one of a sorrow so deep, that it was tearing his soul apart. "Mike…tell them all that I’m sorry. Can you do that for me?"

"NO!! Because you’re not going to do this, Raph, you’re going to get up, you’re going to walk out of here, you’re never going to touch him again, please Raph…for all our sakes…"

After a few brief moments, Raph looked back down at me, pleading. "We are better than this, aren’t we, Rock?"

My head arched backward, and I felt myself losing everything. I was merely a passenger in my own body now; the part of me that really ran this whole show had taken over. After a few moments of frightened breathing, I felt it saying for me, "No, we’re not."

I honestly don’t know who looked more frightened at that moment, Mike or Raph.

"Rock…what are you saying?" they simultaneously wondered in abject horror.

"I’m saying…" I took a few deep breaths, then swallowed hard. "It is destiny. This is why…Raph’s here…because I always wanted to know. And now I want to find out."

Raph looked at me again, this time with a look of understanding. He nodded. "So you’re sure?"

I looked at Mike, then Raph, then Mike one last time, then back at Raph. Somewhere, two million light-years from myself, I heard myself saying, "I’m sure."

"Mike?" Raph asked. Mike hung his head, shook it a few times, and turned to leave. He gave me a pleading look, as if he could change my mind.

"Rock…you don’t have to do this…remember how scared you were? You couldn’t even stand up after the game. Remember that? Try to feel that again right now. ‘Cuz right now, I don’t think even Raph wants to do this."

"I do," Raph said, very quickly and almost clipping his words.

Mike was getting frustrated. "Rock, come on, I know you don’t want to do this—"

I cut him off. "I do, Mike. For just a second before you walked in, I understood it all, I understood just why you guys are here, I understood why I wanted this all along…and I want to understand it all again. Even if it’s just for a moment."

Raph nodded. It seemed the same thing had happened to him. "Leave us, Mike. This is something we both have to do."

"Rock…?"

"I already told you, Mike."

"Raph…?"

"Go."

Without a word, he turned, left, and graciously closed the door behind him.

"So we’re a go," Raph marveled in near disbelief.

"Yeah."

"We doin’ this with you in streets, or are you goin’ buck?"

"Buck. Let me up."

Raph unwrapped himself from me, and I got up and faced him. "Let’s do this slow. You think?"

"Whatever’s comfortable," Raph said.

"Heck, let me do my best Gypsy Rose Lee impression here," I joked.

"You don’t have the body to be a stripper!" Raph laughed good-naturedly.

"But I still got"—I swiveled my hips a little—"the moves, ya know?"

"Rock…" He shook his head and grinned. "OK, Gypsy Rock Lee, let’s see what you got." He scooted up to the edge of the bed.

"Don’t touch me, and don’t touch yourself, OK, Raph? I’m the one who’s going to do the touching, neh?"

Raph squirmed. "Eh."

I quickly bared my chest up to about my midriff—no point dwelling on the bay window, I knew—and started slowly moving my shirt up towards my nipples. I don’t have a lot of chest hair—just one half-hearted growth of short stuff up the center of my chest. It gets thicker around my nipples, though, and I decided to show that before I got too far along. Raph gave a lecherous "HMMmmm…" as I moved the center of my shirt up to show the hair.

With a swerve in my step, I moved over towards him, my right hand holding up my shirt, my left reaching out towards him. At the exact same instant, I bunched my shirt at my chin, bared my nipples, and started stroking his right thigh. I started swaying my chest back and forth, while continuing to explore Raph’s thigh, moving my hand both to the inside and up towards his shell. Raph groaned in anticipation.

I looked him in the eyes, a look of what felt like wicked rapture crossing my face. My right hand held my shirt at my neck, while my left was making hula gestures in the air. Raph didn’t know whether to laugh or moan. So he did both.

In one swift motion, my shirt was off, and halfway across the room. Raph reached out, and I shook my head. "Oh, no you don’t, Raph. Sit on your hands if you have to." He gave me a look of lustful laughter, and then put his hands under his hips.

I disposed of my socks quickly, and then started working on my belt, unbuckling it and slooooowly taking it out of the loops. When it was out, I waved it seductively in the air in front of Raph, who squirmed. The belt joined my shirt on the other side of the room.

"Hurry this up, Rock…this is getting painful…"

"In time, Raph…we’ll get there…"

His head arched backward, eyes closed, in a primeval, reptilian moan. "Rock, please…this hurts…"

"We’ll get there, Raph…" And with that, I stepped up to him, with nothing on but my pants and unmentionables, and started massaging both of his thighs. Slowly, then more quickly, then slower, then faster. I could feel the tension increasing in the muscles as I ran my hands over them. I decided I’d better hurry up and get the fun stuff started quickly.

I didn’t spend much time getting out of my jeans, although I did twirl them around in the air a bit, just for show, after they were off. Raph was gritting his teeth, and vocally straining as if he had the world’s worst case of irregularity. His hands—still under his hips—were almost balled into fists with the tension.

I stood before him in my skivvies, moving my pelvis around as lewdly as I knew how. Raph was breathing so heavily that I thought he’d bust a lung. I teased at the waistband of my briefs, peeking them down on the side for a second, then letting them go back up. Raph didn’t need me to take them all the way off—he could see the important parts right through them, and what he saw evidently was stimulating enough.

Without any further ceremony, I ripped off my drawers, threw them over with the rest of my streets, and stood before him in the raw.

He reached out for me. "No, not yet…"

"Rock…" His voice almost squeaked.

"Let me. Why are you still keeping it in there?"

"Because I don’t…want…to just…" He gulped down a few breaths of air, almost like a landed fish. "Rock, please, let’s just do this and get it over with…"

"Hey, I can handle this. Let’s see what you got in there, for the first time, for-real…" I knelt down beside the bed, my hands on the floor, my head about where his knees were. "Let’s see it, bad boy…"

With a groan, Raph spread his legs and unsheathed his penis. It wasn’t short, either: I knew if this monstrosity ended up inside me, it might do some serious damage. Throw in the rough, almost warty look of it, and I knew this would be one heck of a screw. It seemed to glisten a bit in the half-light, almost as if it had some sort of slime on it. I decided to save the "all-the-way" for later.

My left hand still down for balance, I let my right hand go up between his legs and start fondling the organ. Raph’s breath was now coming in audible gasps as I ran my hands over the length of the shaft, the "slime" (whatever it was) working as a good lubricant. After about a minute, Raph’s hands suddenly clamped on my shoulders, and I knew he was seriously close to the edge.

I quickly took him in my mouth and started running every play in the fellatio handbook. The gunk on his dick had this really weird taste—not quite salty, but not candy-sweet, either. It was about as sweet as a good ginger ale, although the taste was completely different. My hands went back up to his thighs as I worked his pud over as best I knew. The tension I felt in his legs was incredible—it was as if he had become a jointed steel statue. His audible gasps became low-volume screams, and then, without warning, he thrust himself deep into my mouth.

I almost gagged on the explosion of fluids he started pumping out, but I kept working him, eagerly swallowing every last drop of his juices as he continued to spew them forth. After a good ten seconds (which feels a lot longer when you’re having to swallow the whole time), he finally stopped thrusting, and I felt his thighs returning to their previous relaxed state.

"God, Rock…I didn’t know you could do that in real life…" His breathing was slowing down, but still well above normal.

"What, considering all the practice I had in our dreams? You think I can’t learn?"

"Yeah, but…hell, you sure were one master pupil if you could pull all that off your first time it was for-real…"

"I’m a quick study. I graduated with top honors, remember."

"Yeah, I know." He took his cock back inside his shell. I was kind of sad to see it disappear. "Now, then, Rock…your turn."

"And don’t you forget it. What are you up to?"

"Well…" He grinned, then did some lewd gestures with his hands.

"After what we just did?"

"Sure, what the heck. You probably want that more than I did anyway. I won’t complain. That slime on my penis is something I produce whenever I’m horny, and right now I’d be leaking that stuff if I hadn’t just been satisfied. Go ahead, Rock. You always wanted this. Now it’s yours. Of your own free will. Let’s go." He lay back on my bed, his head on my pillow, his legs spread suggestively. "I’m yours, Rock."

I climbed up off my knees, onto my bed, and got in the missionary position. My legs were right next to his, my hands were on his shoulders, and, oh yeah, my schlong was on his plastron. We traded spit for a few seconds, then traded tongues. We were both flailing about, with my crank finding shell, thigh, entrance, and sheets at different points. Raph seemed to be getting tired of it all of a sudden, and he reached down without fanfare, grabbed my prick, and plunged it into himself. The shock of it made me throw my head back and groan.

Raph then lay utterly still as I rode him. I thrust as deeply and as long as I could, pulling myself back until only the tip was in him, then burying myself in him as fully as I could. The slime that had been on his peter felt utterly strange. But what was even stranger was the sensation I felt directly on my putz. I had to stop for a second.

"Raph, what the heck do you have in there?"

"What you’re feeling is my penis rubbing up against yours. This way we can both get our rocks off, n’est ce pas?"

"Works for me," I grunted as I sawed on, savoring the feel of his sprout against mine. I grabbed him by the sides, and looked him dead in the eye. This was going way too far, way too fast—and then suddenly, twelve years of dreams, fantasies, wishes, and hopes came crashing down on my mind in an instant. I almost hurt myself thrusting myself all the way into him. My back arched backward, my head went even further back…despite my bad back, I almost made a letter C with my body at that moment as the sudden weight of all the memory came firing out in a long, white gush. I got back and gripped him for the last few seconds of my orgasm, trying to make it last as long as it possibly could…and then, it was over. Just like that.

We lay like that for a long time, with me still connected to him, as our bodies returned to a normal state. Neither of us wanted to say a thing; we simply looked into each other’s eyes. And for the first time ever, the look I saw there was of genuine love. No sarcasm, no anger, no danger—I knew right then that whatever beasts were within him, for at least this moment, they were contained. I put my arms around his neck, and kissed him again, lightly, on the lips. He gave me a quiet "Hmm" then, a sound which I took to mean that he understood as well. His arms once again caressed my back, and I knew that this moment was about to end.

Raph finally broke the silence. "Rock, I’m sorry. For everything we used to be, for the monster that I was, for the scars I gave you…now I know you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. And I want the chance to be the best thing that’s ever happened to you." He reached down again, helped disengage me, and looked at me again. "No more fear, Rock. None. It’s destiny, and now I think we both understand why. Do you, now?"

I felt myself nod. "Yeah. Raph…I love you…I always have…now let’s be in real life what we never were in our dreams. The two best friends we were meant to be."

He nodded his head under mine, and I knew a new leaf was being turned between us. "We’ll be good to each other…no more hurting each other…no more guilt, no more sleepless nights, no more beating yourself up…yeah…we’ve got a very wonderful future ahead of us, Rock…now let’s let it start now. OK?"

"Raph…anything…let’s just promise each other that we’re going to stay together. Because now we both understand, right? We were both meant to be like this. Let’s swear forever, Raph. Between ourselves, let’s just tell each other that we belong to each other. Now. Forever. You think?"

"Take my hands."

I did.

"I promise you, Rock…I will stay with you forever, I will never leave your side, and I will be the Raphael that you first loved. I will be your best friend, your brother, hell, your husband if you want to go that route…but I want to stay with you forever. And I promise you now, that nothing will ever tear us apart." He closed his eyes for a moment, then sheepishly looked back at me. "Your turn, Rock."

"I promise you, Raph…I’ll never run, never turn, never hide…I will be everything you need me to be. I will be everything you ever saw in me. And if there’s life beyond this, then let’s promise each other that, too. Because no matter how long forever is, I don’t want to spend any time of it without you." I pressed back down on him and gave him a hug.

"Together, Raph."

"Forever, Rock."

"It’s done."

There were nights when the wind was so cold
That my body froze in bed if I just listened to it right outside the window
There were days when the sun was so cruel
That all the tears turned to dust, and I just knew my eyes were drying out forever
Forever… I finished crying in the instant that you left
And I can’t remember where or when or how
And I banished every memory you and I had ever made…
But when you touch me like this, and you hold me like that
I just have to admit that it’s all coming back to me
When I touch you like this, and I hold you like that
It’s so hard to believe, but it’s all coming back to me
It’s all coming back, it’s all coming back to me now
There were moments of gold and there were flashes of light
There were things I’d never do again but then they’d always seemed right
There were nights of endless pleasure, it was more than any laws allow
Baby, baby
If I kiss you like this, and if you whisper like that
It was lost long ago, but it’s all coming back to me
If you want me like this, and if you need me like that
It was dead long ago, but it’s all coming back to me
It’s so hard to resist, and it’s all coming back to me
I can barely recall, but it’s all coming back to me now
But it’s all coming back…
There were those empty threats and hollow lies
And whenever you tried to hurt me I just hurt you even worse and so much deeper
There were hours that just went on for days
When alone at last we’d count up all the chances that were lost to us forever
Forever…
But you were history with the slamming of the door
And I made myself so strong again somehow
And I never wasted any of my time on you since then…
But if I touch you like this, and if you kiss me like that
It was so long ago, but it’s all coming back to me
If you touch me like this, and if I kiss you like that
It was gone with the wind, but it’s all coming back to me
It’s all coming back, it’s all coming back to me now
There were moments of gold, and there were flashes of light
There were things we’d never do again, but then they’d always seemed right
There were nights of endless pleasure, it was more than all your laws allow
Baby, baby, baby
When you touch me like this, and when you hold me like that
It was gone with the wind, but it’s all coming back to me
When you see me like this, and when I see you like that
Then we see what we want to see, all coming back to me
The flesh and the fantasies, all coming back to me
I could barely recall, but it’s all coming back to me now
If you forgive me all this, if I forgive you all that
We forgive and forget, and it’s all coming back to me
When you see me like this, and when I see you like that
We see just what we want to see, all coming back to me
The flesh and the fantasies, all coming back to me
I can barely recall, but it’s all coming back to me…now…
It’s all coming back to me now…
And when you kiss me like this
It’s all coming back to me now…
And when I touch you like that
It’s all coming back to me now…
And if you do it like this
It’s all coming back to me now…
And if we…